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Funny greeting cards

Our range of (blank) humourous greeting cards for any occasion

 

Displaying 1 to 277 (of 277 products)

Funny Vimrod greetings card illustrated with some excellent advice for commuters wishing to create some space on the train!

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a hairy dog stretched out across the sofa "I've been flat out all day!"

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Bestie with two penguins worrying about the consequences of a jumbo jet flying overhead!

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Bestie with two penguins on an iceberg inspecting a new lawnmower "OK I admit it - it was an impulse buy"

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a quote from the late great Peter Cook "Oh yes, I've learned from my mistakes. And I'm sure I could repeat them exactly."

Sweet Peter Cross greetings card illustrated with two mice playing music with a bottle of plonk and entitled "Bottle Cello"!

Funny greetings card illustrated with Fred taking the Rolls for a spin!

Amusing greetings card by Simon Drew illustrated with his interpretation of the well-loved hymn "All things bright and beautiful"

Humorous Harold's Planet greetings card illustrated with a shocking revelation about how men think ... may be not so surprising after all?

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a quote from the great Bill Shankly "Some people think that football is a matter of life and death. I can assure them that it is much more important than that."

Funny greetings card illustrating with two ladies expressing a certain disappointment over their eBay purchase!

Hilarious Vimrod greetings card for wine-lovers "I have a split personality, one side loves red wine and the other side loves white wine. Somehow I get by though"

Hilarious blank greeting card illustrated by Annie Tempest with Lord and Lady Tottering recyling their empties at the "20th" hole from the back of a golf cart!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with a young lady on a tandem displaying an admirable attitude towards energy conservation!

Funny greetings card illustrated with a rather forgetful lady "I was going to make a delicious dinner ... then I remembered, I don't cook!"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an amusing quote from Hunter Thomson ... "I'd hate to advocate drugs, alcohol or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked form me."

Amusing any-occasion greetings card illustrated with three very glam members of the PTA ... not much business being discussed though!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with the pithy observation "I never once heard a man ask advice on how to combine a family and a career"

Funny greetings card illustrated with an intuitive dog who's left muddy footprints all over the kitchen floor ... "I'm sensing we haven't got time for this!"

Amusing Bestie greetings card for the impatient ... "Shall we let it breathe? No, let's murder it now". It's impossible to be sensible when faced with an open bottle!

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a frustrated boxer dog "The trouble with resisting temptation is that you may not get another chance"

Amusing any-occasion greetings card "The last thing she remembered was saying 'I'll just have the one gin and then I'll switch to orange juice'"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an old Burberry advert from the 1960s with the pithy comment "Women are meant to be loved, not understood!"

Hilarious greetings card illustrated with a Punch cartoon of the darleks facing an insurmountable problem ...!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with "The connoisseur" ... perhaps not quite as knowledgeable as he likes to think?

Blank greetings card with a fabulous quote from Spike Milligan "All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy." How long would it take to prove? A lifetime I think?

Funny Harold's Planet greetings card illustrated with instructions on how to properly load a dishwasher, including fitting in your sleeping husband!

Funny greetings card for those who hate having a wardrobe full of nothing to wear

Funny greetings card illustrating a gentleman's philosophies on life

Amusing greetings card by Simon Drew with a small task for the reader "Put the following in chronological order: Hell freezing over, world ending, plumber arriving!"

Any-occasion greetings card for the wild at heart

Blank greetings card illustrated by Vimrod "Rearrange the words below: Another same of the pint please"

Funny greetings card illustrating the catering policy of a sensible woman

Any occasion greetings card illustrated with a rather vain dog ... "J'adore Labrador"

Funny greetings card illustrated with Fred telephoning Ginger to explain that he's stuck in a jam!

Entertaining puzzle-card by Simon Drew. Guess the seven wines he has illustrated in cartoon form. Yes, we can supply answers for the desperate!

Funny blank greetings card illustrated with an old gent trying to explain the principles of cricket to his wife ...!

Any occasion greetings card explaining that "life is either a daring adventure, or nothing." An inspiring quote from Helen Keller.

Blank greetings card illustrated with a man on an exercise bike by Bestie "All this exercise is getting me nowhere"

Funny greetings card for any busy mum ... "Nothing beats the satisfaction of crossing things off a list"!

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated with two neighbours discussing their rather extreme dieting techniques!

Funny greetings card entitled "Where there's cake there's hope". Many a true word is said in jest!

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with mother and daughted both reaching for the vino and entitled "Parental Guidance"! Printed on subtly pearlised, highest quality cream board

Funny greetings card illustrated with a Spike Milligan crossword for idiots

Funny greetings card illustrating the perils of jogging for the very stupid

Horrifying greetings card for anyone keen on gardening, illustrated with a snail on the rampage amongst the seedlings in the potting shed!

Amusing photo-caption greetings card from Cath Tate "Life's too short to be thin" - I agree!

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Simon Drew with a duck behind the wheel of a vintage sports car "I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol!"

Hilarious any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Vimrod "My ten favourite drinks are five gin-and-tonics!"

Funny greetings card for your average chocolate addict "Where the **** is my chocolate?" 25% off original price of £2.20. SALE 25% OFF!

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a small child pushing it's happy grandparent on the swing and entitle "Babysitting Gran". Printed on subtly pearlised, highest quality cream board

Hilarious greetings card "Ironing is my second favourite activity ... my first is banging my head against the wall"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a funny quote from a less-than-accomplished golfer "My golf is improving. Yesterday I managed to hit a ball-in-one."

Funny greetings card illustrated by Annie Tempest with the four ages of women "Horses, little horrors, hormones and horticulture"!

Funny greetings card illustrated with a stylish lady looking rather pleased with herself "Today I got a ferrari for my husband, great swap eh?"

Amusing any-occasion greetings card "Do you think we're binge drinkers?" "Absolutely not! I've never touched a glass of binge!"

Amusing Simon Drew greetings card with an appealing suggestion for teenagers everywhere ... or is it?

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Oliver Preston with a frustating predicament for a desperate skier!

Funny greetings card for any occasion illustrated with a classic quote from Eric Morecambe "My neighbour once asked if he could borrow my lawnmower. I told hime 'Of course. As long as you don't take it out of my garden!'"

Funny greetings card illustrated with a very dapper gentleman water-skier "There was no looking back now that he had discovered accessorising"

Humorous greetings card explaining that the best way to enjoy yourself is very, very badly! Too true.

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Peter Cross with six mousey raiders landing at the foot of the "blue" cliffs of Dover!

Any-occasion Tyrrell Katz greetings card illustrated with a whole range of beetles - not all have six legs!

Amusing greetings card with an observation about the generation gap (perhaps it's not as wide as all that?) "The trouble with young people these days is you are too used to opening packets and defrosting stuff ... why can't you open jars and tins like we used to?"

Funny greetings card illustrated with a bathing beauty "My body's a temple" and her admirer "It looks more like an amusement arcade to me!"

Funny greetings card by Steven Appleby revealing the truth about men (they are experts with machinery, have a flair for cookery, buy practical clothes for their loved ones and are good at communicating their feelings)

Amusing greetings card by Simon Drew illustrated with his interpretation of the popular TV show "Deal or no deal"

Funny greetings card for anyone trying to do up a house ... "Gone for materials, back in a couple of weeks"

Funny greetings card illustrated by Vimrod with an exhausted computer "I think I might crash out right now ...! I think I must be over-working mine too!

Funny greetings card illustrated with a Spike Milligan cartoon of the elusive "Strawberry Moose"

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a clever quip from Gore Vidal " Never have children, only grandchildren "

Any-occasion greetings card saying "Kiss, kiss" from Betty Boop

Any-occasion greetings card by Vimrod explaining that an empty glass means a full life!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with an astute quote by Wallis Simpson "If you can afford it, then there is no pleasure in buying it."

Funny greetings card illustrating a trick we all know men use to get out of the jobs they don't want to do ... artificial incompetence

Stylish retro blank greeting card for the insane illustrated with a quote from Emo Phillips "Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to knaw through the leather straps". Printed on an antique letterpress.

Funny Vimrod greetings card explaining that chocolate is the answer ... "and I don't give a damn about the question!"

Funny greetings card illustrated with a brilliant concept for keeping motivated involving a running machine and a bottle of vino

Very sensible greetings card illustrated with a quote from Bo Derek "Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping."

Funny greetings card illustrated with an addict in withdrawal i.e. closing time at the chocolate shop

Funny greetings card illustrated with Ginger disappointed to find Fred entertaining a bit of crumpet!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with a gentleman showing his wife how to work the TV properly "It's called a remote control, and it's for flicking through all 500 channels every 10 minutes"

Funny greetings card illustrated with the Fred encountering an unexpected dip in the road!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with the Masterchef ... the kind of barbecue chef we all know better than we'd really like

Sweet Peter Cross greetings card illustrated with some little mice making tea from the radiator right under the nose of a snoozing cat!

Funny greetings card illustrated with Ginger disappointed to find Fred in bed with a couple of tarts!

Funny greetings card illustrated with one attractive method of meeting the five-a-day rule

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an amusing quip from Audrey Hepburn "You can always tell what kind of person a man really thinks you are by the earrings he gives you"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with the ultimate conversation-ending excuse "Must go, the gardener wants me!" ... lucky girl!

Yukky but hilarious greetings cards which certainly proves the superior intelligence of dogs: "If you saw two living creatures, one of them does a poo and the other carries it for him, who would you think is in charge?"

Any-occasion greetings card for ladies of a certain age "Of course you can have the body of a 30 year old darling. You'll just have to buy him one or two drinks first!"

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated with two well-dressed sealions on the beach "Oh my goodness Hector, I've just realised we're on a nudist beach"

Funny blank greetings card illustrated with two burly rugby players scrapping over the ball like toddlers "I want it" "No I want it" "You had it last time" "I'm telling my dad of you"!

Humorous greetings card illustrated with a stylish chap in a very natty shirt and shorts combo "He wondered if the matching socks were a mistake?"

Funny greetings card illustrated by Vimrod ... "In life, there is upside, downside and backside (and yours is wonderful)"

Amusing any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Bestie with a Polar Bear who have conflicting reactions to the construction of mobile phone mast!

Entertaining puzzle-card by Simon Drew. Guess the seven US presidents he has illustrated in cartoon form (continues on back of card). Yes, we can supply answers for the desperate!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with a very superior cat occupying the best chair in the house ... "You'll be fine on the floor" (you'll have to be!)

Funny greetings card illustrated with the motto of dustbin dogs everywhere "Waste not, want not!"

Funny greetings card illustrated by Annie Tempest ... the landrover's stuck in the mud and Lord Tottering takes charge "Right! Stop! We've all got to pull together ... work as a team ... and do it MY way!"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Tyrrell Katz with every variety of pants EVER thought of!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with a tough-looking bulldog "If your name's not down, you're not coming in!"

Funny greetings card illustrated with one of Zsa Zsa Gabor's most famous quotes "I want a man who's kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a millionaire?"

Amusing greetings card to dream about ... "If only handbags grew on trees"

Funny greetings card with some helpful parenting advice "You know the point your children have grown up when they stop asking where they came from and refuse to tell you where they are going"

Witty greetings card illustrated by Simon Drew "Health is what we drink to before we fall down"

Funny Bestie greetings card illustrated with a profound observation about the penguin probably not attributable to David Attenborough

Any-occasion greetings card by Tyrrell Katz illustrated with all sorts of cricket moves, including some that aren't in the rule book

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an astute quotation from Oscar Wilde "Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a serious lack of imagination"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an old Burberry advert from the 1960s and a pithy quote about the difference between the sexes "Women worry that men will forget. Men worry that women will remember."

Amusing greetings card by Trumper's World illustrated with two hungry mice "Cream cake missing - how do you plead?"

Amusing greetings card by Trumper's World illustrated with a rabbit munching on a carrot in the vegetable garden "Pick your own!"

Humorous card illustrated with the perfect present for the man who has everything - a woman to show him how to work it

Amusing greetings card explaining that a women's work is never done

Hilarious any-occasion greetings card from the Violent Veg range "the agency hadn't properly explained that she would actually be meeting a blind date!"

Funny greetings card illustrated with the Fred's journey being thwarted by some unexpected traffic scones!

Any-occasion greetings card illustrating an alternative definition of greenhouse gases

Stylish retro blank greeting card illustrated with a quote from the late, great Clement Freud "If you give up smoking, drinking and sex, you don't actually live longer, it just seems longer". Printed on an antique letterpress.

Amusing greetings card by Annie Tempest illustrated with Lady Tottering trying to take the easy option for her brain-training! "At our age we should be doing sudoku puzzles or at the very least a daily dementia check. Apparently you start at 100 and subtract 7 as many times as you can" "OK - where's the calculator?"

Hilarious greetings card illustrated by Annie Tempest "A drop more wine, Daffy?" asks Lord Tottering "No thanks darling - I told you, I'm being good ... I'm limiting myself to only one glass a night." Yes you've guessed it, it's absolutely enormous!

Hilarious greetings card by Annie Tempest illustrating the magical effects of gin and tonic on Lady Tottering "After one large one, Dicky is quite charming. After two or three he starts becoming a bit of a bore, and if I have a fourth, I just fall asleep!"

Hilarious any-occasion greetings card for someone like me "She couldn't understand it ... she'd followed the recipe so closely" and the toast still burned!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with three hikers setting out to tackle a long climb, but it appears that they have failed to do some essential research ... "Where's the nearest pub?"

Amusing greetings card by Trumper's World illustrated with a ewe and her two lambs "Have you had five minutes yet Mum?"

Any occasion card with a fun illustration of a squirrel "It's OK to be a bit nutty"

Hilarious greetings card "After being sent a photo of his car speeding, Ron sent the police a photo of his cheque." What a great idea!

Sweet Peter Cross greetings card illustrated a couple of little mice playing a tune on the piano

Hilarious greetings card explaining carefully that "if it's got tyres or boll**cks, you're going to have trouble with it!" Warning, vulgar language.

Funny greetings card illustrating with a lady in her car "She loved driving. It was the only time she could sit down and concentrate on her hair and make-up!"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a quote from Quentin Crisp "The trouble with children is that they're not returnable!"

Funny greetings card for those who enjoy an early dart from the office every now and then "No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early!" 50% off original price of £1.80. SALE 50% OFF!

Funny blank greetings card illustrated by Vimrod "Forget detox, let's TOX!"

Amusing greetings card illustrated by Simon Drew with the well-known observation about the difference between cats and dogs "Dogs come when they're called. Cats take a message and get back to you."

Funny greetings card illustrating an unconventional approach to the interpretation of recipes

Funny Vimrod greetings card for someone who sees the benefits of being a golf widow!

Funny greetings card illustrated with the Fred admiring a smart car!

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an old Burberry advert from the 1960s and an amusing quip ... "I started out with nothing. I still have most of it."

Funny greetings card illustrated with Ginger explaining the facts of life to Fred jnr!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with good intentions "We firmly believe that there is more to life than money, beer and sex. We just don't know what it is"

Funny Annie Tempest greetings card illustrated with Lady Tottering's revolutionary approach to golf "It's much quicker if you just pick the ball up and stick it in the hole. Can we go for lunch now?"

Funny greetings card for a girl who loves her shoes!

Funny greetings card illustrating with a gentleman locked up in the stocks "He regretted leaving the seat up and not changing the loo roll" ... if only they learnt the lesson!

Funny greetings card occasion card illustrated with a very sensible quote "Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes"

Funny greetings card for any student "It's better to have four hours in college than to get absolutely no sleep at all"

Any-occasion greetings card by Tyrrell Katz illustrated with every move you'll ever see on the golf course ... including some you'd rather not

Any-occasion greetings card by Sarah Gibb illustrating more than clearly that you are what you eat

Amusing greetings card illustrated with a famous quotation by Winston Churchill "Although present on the occasion, I have no clear recollection of the events leading up to it"

Humorous greetings card "Sarah's vodka and coke diet was sort of going well ... she'd lost two days"

Naughty greetings card illustrated with a quotation from Mae West "when I'm good I'm very good, but when I'm bad I'm better"

Blank greetings card illustrated with a cat pretending to look innocent

Funny greetings card illustrated with a scary dog (not!) staring menacingly over the gate

Funny greetings card illustrated with a hard-working mother "Mum said that the kids treated the place like a hotel. They angrily disagreed, stormed upstairs and ordered room-service to bring them dinner!"

Funny Annie Tempest greetings card illustrated with Lady Tottering on the scales "I'm not writing a thank you letter for dinner - I'm writing a letter of complaint!"

Any-occasion card illustrated by Oliver Preston with two skiers having a very gentlemanly argument at the top of a terrifying mogul run ... "After you" "No, please, after you!"

Funny greetings card by Annie Tempest illustrating Lord and Lady Tottering's differing approaches to the weekend chores entitled "Mars and Venus mow the lawn ..."

Humorous greetings card by Steven Appleby which weighs up the advantages and disadvantages of husbands ..

Funny greetings card illustrated by Mel Calman with a wife answering the telephone "He's out looking for his lost youth - so he'll be a long time ..."

Funny greetings card explaining what most women already suspect. Baby: "When I grow up I want to be a man". Mummy: "Don't be silly, you can't do both!"

Amusing any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a great quote from Elvis Presley "Rhythm is something you either have or don't have, but when you have it, you have it all over"

Sweet Peter Cross greetings card illustrated with a little mouse relaxing with his copy of "The Daily Nibble" and a large glass of wine!

Funny greetings card for any occasion illustrated with a wise suggestin for all parents "The best way for a father to give advice to his children is find out what they want to do and then advise them to do it!"

Funny blank greetings card illustrated with a famous quote by Alexander Woollcott "All the things I really like doing are either immoral, illegal or fattening"

Hilarious any-occasion greetings card from the Violent Veg team, inspired by the famous Athena tennis player with a bare bottom ... but everything's gone pear-shaped!

Any-occasion greetings card which will prove most reassuring for those fond of sticky buns

Amusing any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Simon Drew with various national rabbits!

Any occasion greetings card illustrated with an oh-so romantic proposal "Fancy a quickie?" with the cutting reply ... "As opposed to what?"

Amusing greetings card illustrated with an amusing quote from W.C. Fields "a woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her"

Amusing greetings card for anyone getting on in life - a re-visit from the tooth fairy "Want to buy back some of your teeth?"

Funny greetings card by Annie Tempest illustrating the trials we women go through with our hair!

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Bestie with two whales who've got a bit lost!

Entertaining puzzle-card by Simon Drew. Guess the famous sportsmen he has illustrated in cartoon form. Yes, we can supply answers for the desperate!

Amusing greetings card suggesting that "if you're not embarrassing your children, you're not trying hard enough"

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Bestie with a novel use for a classical nude sculpture!

Hilarious Simon Drew greetings card illustrating the perils of tequila

Any-occasion greetings card by Tyrrell Katz illustrated with a whole range of boating activity

Amusing Annie Tempest greetings card on the subject of sailing "What do you mean 'Get a grip'? Your bum's in my face, you've spilt my gin and my hair's gone frizzy ..." Men, they've no idea!

Funny greetings card illustrated with a cartoon by Steven Appleby that anyone who has ever employed builders will appreciate!

Amusing greetings card by Simon Drew illustrated with a limeric for the weak-willed "A lady, while eating her dinner, declared that she'd rather be thinner: But food has a race, to get in my face, and chocolate is always the winner!"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an old Burberry advert and a guide to the male brain "A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is one who hopes they are."

Hilarious greetings card explaining that "Some days it's just one damp thing after another". I've been there, it's sad but true.

Any-occasion greetings card with a great quote "Ever noticed that what the hell is always the right decision?"

Funny Edward Monkton greetings card illustrating the super-normal powers that handbags exert over women

Any-occasion greetings card observing that it's amazing how quickly kids learn how to drive the car, yet are unable to understand how the lawnmower, dishwasher or vacuum cleaner

Amusing greetings card for those in favour of recycling ... their men

Hilarious Annie Tempest greetings card comparing the male and female characters ... Lord and Lady Tottering each demonstrating their own approach to making coffee. I don't think he's heard of multi-tasking! Cartoon continues inside the card.

Amusing greetings card from Trumper's World, illustrated with two ponies having a chat "You can't beat a good gossip!"

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an old dear struggling with her order in the cafe "I'll have one of those Al Pacinos and some of those nuts that make you sneeze" "I think she means she'll have a cappucino and a bowl of cashew nuts"!

Amusing any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an old investment dilemma "Wardrobe or pension" ... wardrobe always wins!

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a great quote from Joan Rivers "I hate housework. You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to do it all over again"

Any-occasion puzzle-card by Simon Drew. Guess the twelve football clubs he has illustrated in cartoon form (continues on back of card). Yes, we can supply answers for the desperate.

Amusing any-occasion greetings card for any shopoholic "So, we'll play this really good game when Daddy gets home, and pretend we've been to the park, fed the ducks and had an ice cream"

Funny greetings card illustrating with a lady enjoying a large drink "There's nothing wrong with sobriety as long as it's done in moderation!"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a great quote "Setting a good example for the children takes all the fun out of life"

Any-occasion greetings card offering some helpful advice to parents of the boomerang generation

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a cartoon showing that you're never too young to master the latest technology

Funny Annie Tempest greetings card for people wishing to communicate with their children ... "If you want an answer from him, you'll have to talk to him via text or instant messaging!"

Everyday greetings card illustrating with a vintage photo "Only dull people are lively in the morning". Thank goodness for that.

Fun greetings card illustrated with a "Where's Wally?" puzzle. Amidst the confusion of pirates on the sea and on the beach, can you spot the tiny figure of Wally? Difficulty: Low (suitable for a child)

Funny any occasion greetings card illustrated by Annie Tempest with all the shortcomings of yacht-ownership "The fine art of getting wet and becoming ill while slowing going nowhere at great expense!"

Amusing greetings card explaining that when the going gets tough, the tough go shopping

Any-occasion card illustrated with the three ways to get something done: do it yourself, hire someone or forbid your children to do it.

Amusing greetings card from Trumper's World, illustrated with a useful motivational technique for those trying to fit into a new bikini!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with a sophisticated woman philosophizing about men "If only they could read our minds ... we wouldn't have to shout!"

Sweet greetings card from Trumper's World illustrated with a mole popping out of his mole-hill "Sat Nav's on the blink again!". 25% OFF ORIGINAL PRICE OF £2.25. SALE 25% OFF!

Funny Bestie greetings card explaining the down-to-earth quality of Aussie wines. Warning vulgar language.

Funny greetings card illustrated with Ginger biting Fred's head off!

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an eminently sensible suggestion "Whenever I feel like exercise I lie down until the feeling passes!"

Funny and very true greetings card "Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your children."

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Vimrod with one benefit that men bring to the world (something for the girls to laugh at!)

Funny Bestie greetings card illustrated with an amusing reaction to Moses parting the Red Sea " What do you mean 'it's a bit muddy'? "

Funny greetings card from Trumper's World illustrated with two pigs in conversation "I see Gordon's in the Brown stuff again!" ... is he ever out of it we wonder?

Amusing any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a father wondering just "where mothers learn all those things they tell their daughters not to do?"

Any occasion greetings card illustrated by Bryn Parry with two bears playing rugby. 22p per card supports the charity Help for Heroes.

Humorous greetings card illustrating one interpretation of a balanced diet "After a bowl of carrot and coriander soup and a banana, he deserved to feel self-righteous ... so now he was off to the pub for his five-a-day!"

Amusing greetings card illustrated with two cats on the desk ... Are you sure it's a mouse?

Blank greetings card illustrated by Bestie with a lady penguin melting a hole in the iceberg "Wow Dorothy! That was some hot flush!"

Humorous greetings card for exercise-phobics "If God had meant me to touch my toes, he'd have put chocolates on the floor!"

Funny greetings card illustrated by Mel Calman with a wife bemoaning her lot in life "The trouble with marriage is that it has deprived me of adult conversation"!

Funny greetings card illustrated by Bestie with five frogs leaping out of the golf-course lily pond and onto the safety of the green

Funny Bestie greetings card illustrated with a keen yachtsman who knows all the the appropriate nautical terms. Warning: Vulgar language.

Hilarious greetings card illustrated with a sensible approach to the chores ... "Sod the housework! I'm off down the pub!"

Very cute blank greetings card illustrated with a photo of long-haired guinea pig and entitled "Bad hair day"

Amusing any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Simon Drew with a duck who doesn't quite get to the ball .... Cinderella tennis!

Hilarious greetings card from Urban Graphic "I'd take shopping over sex and day. Anything that seems a bit small or disappointing when you get it home can easily be exchanged for something more satisfying"

Funny greetings card illustrated with an amusing Thelwell cartoon depicting the easy life on the allotment

Fun greetings card illustrated with a "Where's Wally?" puzzle. Amongst all the confusion of fishermen and mermaids, can you find the tiny figure of Wally? Difficulty: Medium (suitable for a child)

Witty greetings card illustrated with the recipe for the perfect dress ... push you up, pull you in, knock 'em out! 25% OFF ORIGINAL PRICE OF £1.99! SALE 25% OFF!

Funny greetings card entitled "The ski enthusiast" by Tim Bulmer ... I think we've all met one!

Funny greetings card illustrating the common complaint of canine selective deafness "Bill and Ben didn't seem able to hear commands such as sit and heel ... but they could hear a sweet wrapper rustling at 800 metres!"

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Bestie with a stag trying to decide which girl to spend his weekend with "Oh deer! Deer! Deer! ...."

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated with two old ladies having a natter "I tried a few types of contact lenses, but found I was going round in circles ..." "Ohhh! Had you put them both in one eye?"

Amusing greetings card "Don't you just love ... relaxing after a hard day" (of shopping!)

Entertaining puzzle-card by Simon Drew. Guess the six soap operas he has illustrated in cartoon form (continues on back of card). Yes, we can supply answers for the desperate!

Amusing greetings card illustrated with a pompous old fart stating that "Everyone is entitled to my opinions" ... I'm sure I've met him somewhere?

Cute greetings card illustrated with a little black moggie who's trying to assist with the baking ... "Always here to help!"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with an old Burberry advert and an amusing bon mot ... "A budget is just a method of worrying about money before you spend it, as well as afterwards."

Any-occasion greetings card for someone with young children "Don't you just love ... sunday mornings in bed with ALL the family!"

Funny greetings card illustrated with the Fred complaining to Ginger that someone just cut him up!

Funny greetings card observing that "men rule the world, once women have sorted everything out". Do you think they realise?

Funny Harold's Planet greetings card illustrated with the difference between life before and after Satnav. The answer? You just get lost a different way!

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a demonstration on "Wine tasting with Mango" (a dog). He obviously has a great nose when it comes to wine.

Any-occasion greetings card by Tyrrell Katz illustrated with all the moves in rugby

Naughty any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a the suggestion that the way to a fisherman's heart is through his flies!

Funny Harold's Planet greetings card illustrated with some original tips to help you get the most out of your sofa

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with your average hard-working cat (busy, busy busy)

Hilarious any-occasion greetings card for those who don't care for La Mode "I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch!"

Any-occasion greetings card by Annie Tempest "When it's good to be the third person in a marriage". Lucky doggins!

Funny greetings card illustrated with Fred arriving back from the pub legless!

Any-occasion greetings card illustrating every dog's worst nightmare

Any occasion greetings card illustrated by Bryn Parry with a golfing bear. 22p per card supports the charity Help for Heroes.

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a stinging remark from the bar lady "Would you like to speak to the man in charge ... or the woman who knows what's going on?"

Any occasion greetings card illustrated by Bryn Parry with a footballing bear. 22p per card supports the charity Help for Heroes.

Funny greetings card illustrated with a scientist working on the mysteries of the female brain

Amusing greetings card by Simon Drew illustrated with two chaps witnessing a terrible accident!

Any-occasion greetings card "Successful women can still have their feet on the ground. They just wear better shoes."

Amusing blank greetings card illustrated by Vimrod for those who find housework taxing "Messy house, happy soul"!

Amusing Annie Tempest greetings card "What's the point of all your hard work in the garden if I'm not allowed to sit down and enjoy it ..?" Well he does have a point doesn't he?

Any-occasion greetings card by Tyrrell Katz illustrated with some interesting elephant facts

Funny any-occasion Vimrod greetings card for anyone who hasn't managed to get their spam under control "I get soooo many emails every day. It's amazing being so popular (who is this Viagra person anyway?)"

Funny greetings card illustrated by Oliver Preston with a nightmare scenario from the Antiques Roadshow ... "Would you like to know what they would have been worth as a pair?"

Amusing greetings card illustrated with the words "Actually, not ALL my favourite things have icing!"

Any-occasion greetings card for someone who loves the daily chores ... but prefers not to be there when they happen (I think that applies to all of us)

Helpful greetings card providing some irresistible advice to avoid drinking water

Blank greetings card illustrated by Vimrod for any shopoholic "Rearrange the words below: good is shopping for you"

Hilarious greetings card illustrated with a sensible woman enjoying a doughnut ... "When was the last time you saw Kate Moss this happy?"

Blank Bryn Parry greetings card illustrated with a gorgeous Labrador entitled "Mellow yellow"

Any-occasion greetings card for the unfulfilled - "chocolate is better than sex ... well, it's available"!

Observant greetings card for any cat-lover "There are no ordinary cats"

Any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a collage-style froggy ... "Hello Mr Frog"

Funny greetings card advocating a serious solution for a serious shopping habit ... husband replacement therapy!

Blank greetings card illustrated with a cartoon by Annie Tempest "The who's driving tonight debate" ... sound familiar?

Humorous greetings card illustrated with a grumpy-looking cat "I'm high on life, can't you tell?"

Amusing greetings card illustrating the meaning of "fast food" in every house with small children and dogs!

Funny greetings card illustrated with a frustrated wife on the phone to the PC help-desk "It has no memory and lacks drive ... and my computer has broken too"

Funny any-occasion greetings card illustrated by Annie Tempest with Lord attempting to lay down the law to his labrador ... and giving up ten seconds later!

Amusing any-occasion greetings card illustrated with a slight twist on an old adage ... " Like grandmother, like grandaughter "

Humorous Harold's Planet greetings card illustrated with the fundamental difference between the sexes ... how men and women see maps




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